“My name is John Gardner Brent.
My residence is at No. 1120 Kearny Street in San Francisco.
My business or occupation is Actor.
My qualifications for said office are as follows: I have been a professional improvisational actor with The Committee in San Francisco for seven years. I have no partisan political affiliations. I will have no legal commitments except to the role of Mayor. My experience appearing before audiences has prepared me to improvise successfully and will stand me in good stead to meet the largely ceremonial requirements of this office. I will use every means necessary to defend San Francisco from the twin evils of Manhattanizing (skyscrapers, street crime, smog) and Los Anglicizing (freeways, traffic casualties, smog). I am your non-partisan, non-indicted candidate for mayor.
Ballot designation: actor.
Signature of candidate: JOHN GARDNER BRENT.
Check out the ballot, courtesy of The San Francisco Public Library.